I am going to try and make a promise to myself to write every day of November. Weird challenge. Yes. But it is something I want to do. I haven't been very good with my blog recently, and I feel this promise may kick me up the arse enough to actually write, write, write - and get more addicted and determined to writing in my blog again. It's like my own version of NaNoWriMo - a writing competition which encourages you to write 1, 600 words of your novel a day in November. I wanted to do that this year but with my University work being so hectic I really don't think I will be able to.

So my first blog will be about Bad Luck.

Bad Luck 

Luck has been a distant friend to me recently. I was very lucky in America. I was spoilt by Luck, if you will. I had some amazing friends :D who were encouraging, kind and lovely and I met the boy of my dreams (yep gush gush sorry - I'll stop!). I did also have a fair share of bad luck in the form of a Spaniard 'friend' but we won't go into that (lets just say it nearly destroyed my faith in people and my trust in friendships).

However, I still felt lucky. The sun came up everyday, I was surrounded by support and I had the lovely Andy two seconds away. I also incredible friends from England come and visit me and support me.

I knew this luck may have to be balanced out by the world in one form or another.

It started with little things - my clumsy self dropping plates/cups/items here, there and everywhere. And then it got more serious. I was involved in a car accident. I won't go into details but it wasn't my fault. Yet it proved my Mum's theory of "It's not you, it's other drivers that I don't trust" and it shook me up. I also felt incredibly guilty (as I always do) and yet it wasn't even my fault. I had to depend a lot on my parents and I can't thank them enough for their love and support. I also have to say goodbye to driving long distances ever (I never was allowed to in the first place but now, I must admit, even I don't want to).

Second piece of bad luck. Sitting in bed, I was doing my work, essaying hard, reading away, drinking a cup of tea and BAM, tea began to slip from my hand. I tried to grab it desperately and as it fell on the laptop I grabbed it and pushed it the other way - onto myself. It was a new cup of tea so I burn my stomach badly in order to save my laptop. However, despite believing I may have saved my laptop it began to not respond as the keyboard died. I stupidly tried to hair dryer the keyboard to make it more dry. Warning kids, DON'T DO THIS. The keyboard keys melted before I had time to turn off the hairdryer. I am getting the laptop repaired and hopefully it will be just the keyboard but *head in hands* I don't know. I had spent the whole day doing good deeds for others. Cleaning Andy's apartment, doing his washing, giving money to all the charity boxes in Bristol and food to homeless people as I was feeling generous and I just felt like why on earth did I deserve this bad harma. I balled my eyes out. However, it was my own fault and I never balance tea on the bed anymore.

Thirdly, my spare laptop which I have had for four years was back in Warwick. When I got there, happily hoping I could switch it on and have a temporary solution....well the loading screen appeared and NOTHING HAPPENED.  I cried. I cried so much. This wasn't even my fault. Luckily, I have a genius boyfriend who knows computers and when I returned to Bristol, he rebooted it for me.

:D

THANK YOU MY LOVE.

Fourthly,
I'm ill. I am so very ill at this point in time. I am not only ill in the sense I have a sore throat, pounding headache and feel feverish but other partially mental issues as well. I have developed insomnia when I am away from Andy. I know sounds pathetic but it's true. I simply cannot sleep. I take it as an opportunity to do more work but when your days are filled with work it's hard to be happy when your nights are too (and evidently I am away from Andy). I also get horrendous stomach cramps instead of hunger pains. Don't know what this is and if anyone would like to fill me in I'd be very grateful.


Anyway bad luck. Do you believe in it? I feel I have had my fair 2013 dosage and hope things will begin to turn around. I am feeling positive. My friend, Chloe, recently told me she didn't believe in bad luck and believed anyone could turn their bad luck into good. So I've tried. I have tried to be positive. All of this expensive bad luck has made me more determined to get a job in January (I didn't want a job where I live in Uni before Xmas as I felt they would make me work through the Xmas holidays and I would be unable to spend any time with family/friends). Also it has led to me applying to graduate schemes. I have also been budgeting very well and finally getting on top of finances (I believe). I am also determined to move in with Andy as soon as possible. I feel that this would a) make us extremely happy and I am prepared to apply to graduate schemes and pause my dream career for a while to earn some money and develop my skills elsewhere. Andy's dream career comes first :). B) I wouldn't be such a financial burden on my parents and I feel they'd respect me more if I wasn't living at home. c) I am prepared to go out there and give it my all in a new exciting company with new opportunities and tasks to complete. d) I am prepared to take creativity into my own hands - I am planning a few documentaries in the upcoming months and writing opportunities. I want to keep my creativity even if University work is trying to drill it out of me and my dream career in creativity seems to being put on hold.


Sometimes I would rant and rave that I was hardly the most deserving of bad luck (that potentially couldn't a famous Spaniard's computer be the one dying in a pool of brown tea) and the world was not being fair. But then I remember all the good things I have in my life and I genuinely feel sometimes the world just has to balance it out. I have Andy. I found Andy. Furthermore, he lives in England and at 5am coach to Bristol is nothing in comparison to the long distances other friends have to put up with (especially those who found love on their year abroad trips). I have my family - my parents being so supportive of me, and my sister being one to always cheer me up. I have my friends - those at home who are always there for me, those from America who have become life long friends and those from Uni who don't mind me jetting off across the country, back and forth to Bristol, and are always there to give me a hug. I have my dogs who are like fluffy therapy sessions. I have my passion for learning which is keeping me through this last horrendous hurdle of a year. So yes, maybe I deserved my dose of bad luck. And maybe if I just keep my head above the water and try not to be beaten down by it. Obstacles are going to be thrown at me and I just have to keep going.

Thank you to all those to have been there for me. Hopefully I can turn this all around :).

Watch this space and see if I will update every day :D

x